I have stressed out with my new life in Tokyo.

I just came back from England, where I stayed for eight months.
I would like to start writing my diary in English in order to keep my English level. Actually, I love writing in English very much even though I am not good at writing it yet. Writing English is one of my main sources of enjoyment. Anyway, let’s begin.

I have been in trouble with my new life and work since moving to Tokyo from England. I have got stressed out recently with my hectic days. Maybe that’s why I passed out a couple of days ago after work.

I work at a Japanese soba restaurant instead of my great aunt who is in hospital because of having a terminal cancer. That’s why I came back to Japan to take over her position. My older cousin also asked me to help him. I thought that if I had not helped this family this time, I would absolutely regret it so I gave up studying and working in England.

I caught a bad cold the day before yesterday. I had a fever of 38 degrees last night. My cousins and one of their wives(wife 2) visited my flat to see me and bring some food, mineral water and medicine. Wife 2 is quite kindly and generous; she is really nice to me. I am most grateful to her for always helping me. On the other hand, Wife 1 is extremely nasty. She does not do anything. Her husband-he is my older cousin- does everything instead of her. She is always sitting on the chair in the living room and waiting for everything that her husband does for her. Cooking, making coffee, washing dishes or cups, everythihg is his job. In addition to that, she is a quite jealous person. If she sees that her husband and I are chatting well together, she becomes a green-eyed monster and then she might grumble about me to her husband. Maybe that’s why my cousin starts ignoring me when the three of us are together. It is ridiculous, isn’t it?

Besides, my older cousin also has some problems. I had an argument with him last night even though I was suffering from my high fevers. He is also very selfish. He is just thinking of only his wife and his mother.It seems that he thinks that he is very clever and looks down on other people including me as well. He sometimes becomes very arrogant. He can not appreciate other people who help him. He thinks that it is normal to be helped because of his greatness. His thinking way is much worse than I thought it would be so I needed to talk with him patiently to make him notice his selfishness by himself, otherwise it could be become difficult to work with him together in a small restaurant. Fortunately, it seemed that he could understand what I wanted to tell him. He promised that he would try changing his way of thinking even though it will be probably quite hard for him and it might take him quite a long time. Anyway, I was really happy with his understanding.

I have to face a lot of difficulties by myself alone even though Wife 2 always helps me well and my older cousin has changed his mind. Unless Wife 1 changes her mind and attitude, everybody will be unable to live happily after all.

To be honest, I am really very tired with my new life. It is because there are so many family problems indeed and I am involved with them deeply. I am really fed up with them but I can not escape. Of course I am trying to avoid them as far as possible. I wish I were still in England now without any such difficulties. I just wish I were still in England now without any such difficulties. But what's done is done so maybe I should try not to think or worry too much. I need to take it easy.

Wife 2 said to me I do not have to work tomorrow as well. She thinks that I must have a good rest this weekend. If I were still the same as I used to be, I could not have accepted her kindly offer because of my very strict sense of responsibility but I have changed my mind already. Too much discipline does not help me at all. I agreed with her and I have been resting since yesterday.

Even though it was raining heavily, I went to a book shop to buy a book which was just released yesterday . I am going to read it after finishing writing today’s diary.


Actually, I think I am a lucky person as well because I have some very good friends who are very thoughtful.

I hope I have a good day tomorrow






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2008年05月25日 20:18
Hi, Meihua-san! Congratulations on your starting a new English Diary, from which and what you told me I can see how stressful your new life here in Tokyo is. Please remember I'm always worried about you.
I just want to say,"Enjoy BL zanmai life!"(^^)
2008年05月25日 20:54
2008年05月25日 22:41
あいさん こんばんは♪

Thank you for your comment. I am so sorry that maybe I made you worried about me because of my this diary but actually I am still alright.Because I have a wonderful friend like you here in Tokyo.

By the way, I have finished reading "GROW BACK" It was quite interesting for me. What do you think?
2008年05月25日 23:01
Hello James,

Thank you so much for your comment and email. I have just read these.
I am going to go to rewrite this diary according to your advice, maybe tomorrow.

I am really glad to be able to receive your email again. To be honest, I already expected that maybe you never wanted to write me again because of my last email. But I thought that if you would just get angry with that, our friendship was not so strong after all.
2008年05月25日 23:05

Anyway, I could not hide my real feeling, as you may well know. Actually, I might have lost another friendship recently. So I am a bit depressed but I am happy that I could know that you are my real close friend.

But I would like to say sorry for making you upset anyway.

I will send email as soon as possible.

Please give my best to your family, especially to Brandon!

I miss you and England.

2008年05月26日 03:15